Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Alan Turing's iconic paper on a 'universal computing machine' goes up for auction - Live Science

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Imanaga Rehab, Boyd Shoulder, Reliever Swaps, and Other Cubs Bullets - Bleacher Nation

I understand how hurricane paths work

I see through liars

I know who the president of Turkey really is

Want to know how long you’ll live? This 10-second sit-stand test might have the answer - Times of India

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Climate change leads to spread of infection-causing fungi, scientists say - ABC News

I have a reading level above third grade

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Health officials warn of measles case from traveler at Dulles Airport - The Washington Post

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Do you love fat pussy?

I can count

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

If Delta Force soldiers wanted to form a criminal gang, how dangerous would they be with all their equipment (explosives, rifles, vests, night vision goggles)?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Is Jesus God almighty?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

Can BRICS defeat the US economically?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

We've finally slowed the surge in overdose deaths. The Trump admin may undo all of it - Salon.com

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t cotton to rapists

The President Is Dead (In Helldivers 2) - Kotaku

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Intercontinental title match is no longer happening at Night of Champions - Cageside Seats

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Trump says Xi agreed to restart flow of crucial minerals, but analysts say China won’t give up its ‘rare earth card’ - CNN

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I have complete contempt for fakery

I can read

I actually pay taxes

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t buy bullshit

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.